How to break through the emotional barriers that may be holding you back

Things most people want: to be able to manage their time more effectively, forget self-limiting beliefs and, of course, the ability to make more money.

I have met a number of real estate and other professionals who are stuck behind emotional barriers that keep them from success. But there are solutions to the problems we all face.

Fears, expectations and self-limiting beliefs

These issues are the most common. 

About 99 per cent of the population goes about their day with a fear of rejection, and stressing about being rejected by a client is 80 per cent of the reason you might not be reaching your potential. 

Fear of the unknown may mean you don’t set goals for yourself or have a plan for how you will approach your day.

And, not only do we have a habit of fixating on our fears, but we also tend to hold beliefs that limit us. ‘I’m not smart enough’ and ‘I’m not a natural’ are phrases that are pretty common from people in all walks of life. 

To battle the self-limiting beliefs that plague your mind, see everything as a learning experience.

The solution: plan for success

If you’ve had any of the above somewhat irrational thoughts, consider setting a strategic plan to refocus you on your goals, rather than your fears. 

Here are my top tips for creating a strategic plan:

1. Income

If you were to earn extra money what would you do with it – invest, save or spend? Write your goals down on paper.

2. Set long-term goals

Don’t limit this to work; set goals in every area of your life. This will help you to stay more focused and think positively. The act of setting goals releases dopamine, which contributes to motivation and prepares you for ‘the chase’.

3. Set short-term goals

Long-term goals require delayed gratification and can sometimes feel unachievable. By breaking down these larger dreams into smaller goals, you will enjoy your accomplishments more often. Aim to create goals that will take 30-60 days to reach. Taking action towards your goals releases adrenaline into your bloodstream; adrenaline prepares you for battle and you begin to fight harder for your sales.

4. Keep learning

To battle the self-limiting beliefs that plague your mind, see everything as a learning experience. Rather than ‘My brand isn’t well known’, instead try ‘How can I make my brand better known?’ Ensure that you participate in ongoing coaching/training and that you read the latest information about the market so that you feel up-to-date. Studies show that 50 per cent of your learning becomes redundant every 2.5 years, so new knowledge gives you the winning edge.

5. Take a break

Did you know that time off actually boosts your work performance by 400 per cent? So, if you’re feeling incapable or inefficient, stop delaying that holiday you’ve had planned for a year and go! Celebrating your wins is paramount to success. As you celebrate, your body secretes serotonin which causes you to think more clearly, learn faster and become more resilient.

Does it work?

Some of these issues may be striking a chord with you, as will be the case with many other agents reading this. But now you’re probably asking the question, ‘Does the solution actually work?’

Common feedback I receive from clients is that they have found the key to success through a work-life balance and stronger emotional intelligence – so don’t get stuck behind self limiting beliefs!

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Daniel Tolson

Daniel Tolson is a business coach specialising in Emotional Intelligence and Strategic Planning. He has consulted with thousands of clients to help them add more revenue to their bottom line. Daniel has also competed with the world's top athletes at the extreme games, and is a former Australian champion wakeboarder.