Here are 10 questions you need to ask yourself to enact change

Because we live in a society that works in time compartments, twice a year in January and June we get to rewrite our agreement with reality. But if you wanted to, you could make resolutions for yourself any day of the year to keep yourself accountable.

Here is a list of his favourite self-coaching questions that you can use to uncover areas in your professional or personal life that may need to change.

1. What are you doing that people believe only you can do?
This question is crucial because it creates separation between you and the competition.

2. What do people say when they talk about you?
You win business by what others are saying about you, not by what you’re saying about you. You may see yourself as being empathetic and a good listener.

Other people may be saying ‘he never shuts his mouth, he doesn’t listen’. That gives you feedback about where you are at, versus where you think you’re at.

3. If you had all the money and resources you needed and you could spend your life any way you chose – what would you do?
So many times people create a path in their life, not of what they want to do but what they think they have to do.

When you take away the barrier of money and give yourself a blank canvas, pick something that you would love to be doing.

Sometimes, when your intention is not to make money, if you love what you are doing, the result is you make money.

On that note, you should spend the next 12 months doing things that you’re really good at, and that you like. Which means, work your strengths and outsource your weaknesses.

4. What are you afraid of?
What you resist will persist, and what you befriend you’ll transcend.

When you work out what you’re afraid of, and you’re clear about it, you can address it.

By facing your fears, they no longer control you. You may not believe this, but at university my fear was public speaking. I faced my fear and obviously, it’s a big part of who I am now.

5. Who are you trying to change?
Change is hard. Think about how hard it is to make a change yourself and then think what is the likelihood that you’ll change someone else?

Work on yourself first, rather than others.

6. What is missing from your life right now?
If you only had 30 days to change or fix something, what would you do?

The answer will tell you what you need to work on for the rest of the year.

7. You are 90 years old looking back at your life. What would you have liked to have achieved to consider your life to be fulfilling?
This is reverse engineering – working backwards and figuring out, ‘What do I want to be saying in the last hour of my life?

What do I want others to be saying about me? Do I want to feel like I’ve lived a lie, or feel that I’ve played big?’ Don’t leave it to your last day, your last hour to make that change or take action.

8. Would people miss the things you do if you stopped doing them? 
What things are you doing out of habit, and what you do out of intent?

Ask yourself, ‘If I was starting from scratch today, would I have this procedure or practice in my business?’ If the answer is no, then change it.

9. What do you stand for?
In this busy, destructive world where people have a total addiction to distraction, you need to be clearly able to tell another human, ‘This is who I am, this is what I do, this is what I stand for,’ so people in an instant can work out what you are about. Trade in perfect and fake for real.

10. What contributions are you making?
What impact are you making on your are you making on your industry, on your family, on your community, and on your friends; because at the end of the day, that’s how you will be remembered.

And one last thing. Change is going to be difficult before it’s easy. And once you start, don’t go off track – it’s easier to stay in momentum than to get into momentum.

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Tom Panos

Tom Panos is a real estate coach, trainer and speaker with 22 years of experience. For more information, visit